I LAUGHED REALLY LOUDLY AT HOW PISSED DEAN WOULD BE IF SAM BROUGHT THIS HOME
“I’m back, Dean! Guess what I brought!” Sam called as he let himself into their hotel room.
“Took you long enough. What, some conditioner?” Dean didn’t even try to move from his spot on the bed. He was busy looking through the newspaper for reasons known only to Dean Winchester.
“Nope. Your favorite thing.” Sam pulled the plastic container out of the grocery bag and waved it at just the right angle. Dean glanced over, seeing the flash of crust strips over red filling.
“Dude! You got an entire freaking pie?” Dean was on his feet and after the pie instantly. It’d been weeks since they’d gotten decent pie.
Sam grinned enthusiastically as he set it on the table. “Yeah. Dig in. It’s not fresh, but its probably good.” He retreated out of the room.
Dean worked the clear covering off and found a fork somewhere. There was something kind of weird about the pie, but he didn’t care. Mouth watering, he dug the fork in and-
There was no thick, liquid resistance against the fork edge, no stain of red juice bubbling over the edges from the pressure. He forked out a bite and lifted it, staring in disbelief.
It was white cake.
It was fucking white cake disguised as pie.
“FUCKING HELL, SAMMY, I’M GONNA BEAT YOUR ASS SENSELESS!”
AU: Dean is in a minor accident when hit by Castiel’s car. Dean decides that Cas should buy him dinner to apologise, and the two form an unexpected friendship.
SERIOUSLY THE CONCEPT OF ASEXUALITY IS AS FUCKING CLEAR AS HOMOSEXUALITY OR BISEXUALITY OR PANSEXUALITY LIKE ITS NOT FUCKING HARD TO UNDERSTAND IT MAY IN FACT BE THE EASIEST TO UNDERSTAND BUT PEOPLE ARE SO FUCKING HARDHEADED AND STUBBORN THAT THEY REFUSE TO BELIEVE THAT ITS REAL LIKE. ARE YOU FUCKING WITH ME. YOU HAVE TO BE FUCKING JOKING
this is a thing
I knew it wasn’t going to hold up.